You pick the china. You design your closets. You choose the wedding ceremony colors. You order monogram towels. You name your 2.5 children. You even fantasize about your names together. Name-hyphen-name, right? Wrong! There is far too much at stake here for you not to take this major transition seriously.
A few years ago Phylicia Rashad, who played America’s favorite TV show mom Claire Huxtable, wrote a letter to her 21 year old self. She forewarns “Romantic involvement distracts you and can blind you to what’s really in front of you.” That one line ought to stop you dead in your fairytale tracks for at least asking “What’s in front of me?” Only you can answer that question. Use the answer as a starting point.
Continue to check with yourself before you decide. What are your expectations? What will be expected of you? What are you willing to compromise? Are you even willing to compromise?
The questioning doesn’t stop. Take some time to explore. As much time as you need. Just as much as every experience produces a blessing and a burden, know building a future with someone you love is not exempt. Be prepared for reality.
READ PHYLICIA RASHAD’S ARTICLE HERE